Ashley Smith loses the plot #4

Wednesday 02-11-2016 - 12:13

This Wednesday saw a momentous occasion, I was well again and actually turned up to a session! I know I can’t believe it either and what this allowed me to do was partake in the many fulfilling activities. This however was not the only thing I did, this week I decided to put on my brown coat and fedora and become a journalist. Do not worry though I have not tapped into anyone’s phones…yet but I have gone and done a volunteer interview. One of the many reasons for doing this was to not only prove to you I attended, but to let know amazing people turn up for a couple of hours every week to help out around the allotment.

This week’s interview is with a first year student who goes by the name of Scott. Now I don’t know how well this went but let’s just say it didn’t go very well.

My first question after finding out his name was this…

So Scott why have you turned up today? His reply was…

“Well I like gardening because it’s relaxing and I like doing it”

This left me at a bit of a dead end, I must confess this was the only question I had written down and I had hoped for a bit more detail. When asked him to elaborate on this he carried on talking which was quite a relief for me as I was already struggling.

                “It’s nice because everything is chilled out and everybody is here to help out and I do it at home” Of course I had to clear up what “Do it at home” meant. I did for a brief moment think that this would be the defining moment of my short lived career as a journalist. As everyone knows in the media industry knows that there is no greater feeling than uncovering a scoop about someone’s home life. I later found out that he meant gardening, I then tried to delve even further into Scott’s life with this great question…

                “So Scott what course are you doing?”

If you didn’t already know, this question is probably the second most asked question in every university campus anywhere around the world. I will leave it up to you to think about what the most frequently asked question is. He replied…


Being an individual who had no idea what that was, it was clear to Scott that I had no idea what the words that had just left his mouth meant. It was fair to say that not one syllable was met with any understanding. I then rattled my brain for a follow up question that would be deemed appropriate by my peers. After about forty five minutes of silence I hit him with this…

                “What is Microbiology?”

He then explained to me that the course he does entails learning about diseases and illness. This instantly reminds me of the fantastic two weeks of year six in primary school doing the D.A.R.E programme. I then asked him about this but I deemed the answer too exciting for my dear readers to take in. So I left it there.


This leads us to the weekly feature…


  • Weeds – So many weeds were pulled out I couldn’t quite beweed it!

And that was about it in terms of produce but I can assure you everybody there had a great time and ate last week’s Tomatoes.

Tune in next week and even turn up to the allotment because it’s pumpkin carving time! If I have it my way there will be a theme of infamous dictators of history. I think I’m doing Khrushchev.


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